Your Parents Bought a House at 23...
We're Just Trying to Buy Groceries
Author: Dr. Julie. Sorenson, DMFT, MA, LPC
Navigating Through Today’s Financial Reality — Protecting Peace, Self-Esteem, and Financial Health for Young Adults and Divorcees
2025, stepping into independence, whether as a young adult or someone rebuilding after divorce, it’d no longer be the simple rite of passage it once was. Today’s young adults are entering one of the most financially challenging environments in the history of the US. Housing costs have outpaced wage growth, everyday essentials take a bigger chunk of income, and tuition debt and medical expenses continue to strain budgets (U.S. Census Bureau, 2024; U.S. Treasury, 2025; U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, 2024). These shifts mean the paths earlier generations relied on, such as affordable rent, more reasonable college expenses, or entering the housing market early, have fundamentally changed.
The story doesn’t end with financial constraints. Across the country, young adults and newly divorced individuals are validating extraordinary adaptability. Many are budgeting with intention, delaying major commitments, prioritizing mental health, diversifying income streams, and redefining what stability looks like in a modern context. What might appear as “being behind” from an older perspective is actually a highly rational and resilient response to economic strains that have transformed over decades.
Despite the challenges, countless individuals are not only surviving — they are carving out meaningful, purpose-driven lives. Independence in 2025 is no longer about hitting universal milestones by a specific age; it is about understanding the context, protecting one’s peace, and designing a life that aligns with personal values, well-being, and realistic financial possibilities.
Strategies for Today’s Unfortunate Economic Reality
There are practical strategies and growth mindsets that can help Gen Z, Millennials (Gen Y) manage, survive, and ultimately thrive.
- Budget fiercely and honestly.
Tracking income and distinguishing between fixed expenses (housing, utilities, transportation) and variable ones (entertainment, clothing, subscriptions). Identifying your “bare-minimum survival budget” builds a foundation for healthier financial choices and reduces anxiety. - Delay big financial commitments strategically.
Buying a home used to be considered a milestone of early adulthood, but today’s housing costs and interest rates often make renting the more stable and flexible option (Newsweek, 2025). Choosing affordable rentals, adding a roommate or two, and holding off on major purchases until your income stabilizes is a responsible strategy, not a setback.
- Boost or diversify income without burning out.
Side gigs, freelance roles, upskilling, and occasional part-time work can increase income in meaningful ways. However, financial health should not come at the expense of mental health. Make sure to add time for yourself in each day. Strive for balance: growth without burnout.
- Prioritize essentials & minimize lifestyle creep.
Elevated food, energy, and transportation costs demand intentionality (OfficialData.org, 2025). Distinguishing between needs and wants protects your budget and mental health. Budget-friendly habits like cooking at home, simplifying entertainment, and reducing impulse spending are not signs of deprivation but tools for stability. - Build a financial cushion, even if it's slow.
Emergency funds are essential in this volatile economy. For divorcees, this safety net is especially important due to legal fees, custody transitions, and unpredictable expenses. Even $20–$50 per paycheck adds up. - Advocate for systemic change.
This generation of young adults and divorcees is not “making poor financial choices.” They are confronting barriers such as high rent, stagnant wages, and rising costs. Supporting policy changes that increase access to affordable housing, promote fair wages, and reduce debt burdens helps shift the narrative from personal blame to systemic understanding. - Protect your peace.
Do not internalize shame if you are not where older generations think you “should” be. The economic context has shifted dramatically. You are navigating a world they did not know or have to endure, and you are adapting with intelligence and resilience.
Why Older Generations Should Consider a New Perspective
- Recognize the changing economy.
The housing market, college tuition, food prices, and energy costs look nothing like they did 20–40 years ago (U.S. Census Bureau, 2024; OfficialData.org, 2025). Many of the advantages earlier generations enjoyed simply no longer exist. - Avoid shame-based expectations.
Questions like “Why aren’t you buying a house yet?” reflect outdated assumptions. Empathy is crucial, not comparison, and fosters healthier conversations across generations. - Support relevant policy change.
Affordable housing initiatives, fair-wage legislation, protections for renters, and educational access without lifelong debt benefit families and communities across age groups. - Acknowledge resilience.
Many 20- and 30-somethings — and many divorced adults — are juggling work, debt, childcare, healing from past relationships, and steep living expenses. This requires extraordinary strength.
Conclusion
The idea of “moving out on your own” or “starting fresh after divorce” has transformed. Economic realities, from housing to tuition to basic living costs, have reshaped the timeline and expectations around independence. For many young adults and individuals undergoing major life transitions, the financial burden can feel overwhelming, sometimes leading to mental health concerns.
Yet independence is still possible. Through honest budgeting, mindful prioritization, supportive relationships, and deep self-compassion, people are carving out their own versions of stability. And with greater awareness, older generations can shift from judgment to empathy, recognizing that today’s challenges are not moral failings but reflections of a transformed economic landscape.
Ultimately, the gap in expectations of where someone “should be” by age 25–35 is not about ambition. It’s about context. Understanding that context, and supporting one another within it, is the first step toward bridging generational divides and building more compassionate, realistic pathways forward.
References
U.S. Census Bureau. (2024). How the nation’s housing changed in 20 years.
U.S. Department of the Treasury. (2025). Rent, house prices, and demographics.
OfficialData.org. (2025). Food price inflation 1985–2025.
U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. (2024). College tuition inflation 2001–2024.
OfficialData.org. (2025). Household energy price inflation 1990–2024.
Newsweek. (2025). How renters’ costs have spiraled in 20 years.